Book review: The Coaching Habit: Say Less, Ask More & Change the Way You Lead Forever by Michael Bungay Stanier
“If seven is consider the perfect number, then Michael provides us the perfect coaching questions.”-Roy Chim
The seven different questions that can guide you to be a better coach in your conversation even you are not a professional coach. You can use the coaching technique and the mindset in a regular daily setting with your friends, family, and strangers.
Here they are, each stand on their own and each have their purpose:
1) The kickstart question:
a. “What’s on your mind?"
2) The awe question:
a. “And what else?"
3) The focus question:
a. “What’s the Real Challenge Here for You?"
4) The lazy question:
a. "How Can I Help?"
5) The foundation question:
a. “What do you want?
6) The strategic question:
a. “If You’re Saying Yes to This, What Are You Saying No To?"
7) The learning question:
a. “What was most useful for you?”
They also can be combine
d with other question to create a combo effect when you're asking question. So if you don't have any framework in mind when you're doing coaching, you can use this framework can guide you to be a better coach.
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1) The kickstart question:
a. “What’s on your mind?"
You can ask the client, “What's on your mind?” to start the conversation.
So let’s stretch the client to examine more angles with second question
2) The awe question:
a. “And what else?"
Whatever the client answers followed by “and what else?” “Yes, and what else?” Until the point when the client says “
no, that's it.” Then you probably draw out a lot of things from that topic.
3) The focus question:
a. “What’s the Real Challenge Here for You?"
As we expand and stretch the topic, we want to help the aim for the goal. The “Real” and “You” are the key. It's not for us, it's for you. And it's not all different challenges but what is the most weighted issue.
123 questions can be used as a combo here. “What's on your mind?” “And what else?” When there's no more to draw out, then we can focus with “What's the real challenge here for you?” and then we can explore the option by “What's on your mind?” again.
4) The lazy question:
a. "How Can I Help?"
Because a client talks to you for a reason. They want some clarity, resources, comfort, or a pair of ears. Maybe we can just let the client talk about it, following up with the fifth type of question.
5) The foundation question:
a. “What do you want?
Coaching is about a client getting from point A to point B. But where does the client really want to go? This can prepare the client to move forward with clarity.
6) The strategic question:
a. “If You’re Saying Yes to This, What Are You Saying No To?"
If you want to do this, then what do you need to sacrifice or tradeoff for that. Maybe money, time, energy, other resources. So, this question will give a good start to think about a plan for action.
7) The learning question:
a. “What was most useful for you?”
This is the wrap up question. The key words are “useful" and "you". So, we can learn from the client point of view to see what the client really values during the conversation.
These seven questions are very good questions, if you don't have coaching structure in mind These would be a good structure. The book is fun to read, over all 4.5 out of 5 reading experience.
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